Thursday, September 24, 2009

Fairy Tales... uncut

Dear Congressman,

While you have been in the halls of Congress fighting against socialism and all things left of center, I starting wondering about fairy tales, in particular the ones Disney made into movies. What were the sources? Did Disney stay true to the original?

Inquiring minds want to know..... Here are two examples...

SLEEPING BEAUTY

Disney version - A princess invokes a curse that on her 16th birthday she will prick her finger on a spinning wheel and die. Curse is altered to eternal sleep if cut and all spinning wheels are outlawed. Cursor leads Princess to spinning wheel on 16th birthday, Princess falls into deep sleep, and Cursor throws Prince into dungeon. Prince escapes, kisses Princess, she awakes, all happy...

Original version - Talia is cursed at birth to be killed by flax. Gets under fingernail as teenager and kills her. Is left on table where local King, hunting nearby, decides to indulge in necrophilia. Nine months later, twins are born, and trying to nurse, suck the flax out from under her fingernail and awaken her from death. He comes back, invites her to palace, where queen decides to serve the twins to him as a meal in revenge. She has the Cook feed them to him in a course of meals, then decides to throw Talia on a fire to burn her to death(again with the death thing !). King discovers this and throws Queen on the fire instead, and her servants for good measure. Before he can cook the Cook, the cook discloses that the kids are still alive and he didn't eat them. Everyone lives happily ever after.

CINDERELLA

Disney version - Beautiful daughter lives with evil stepmother and step-sisters. Gets a wish and goes to ball to meet Prince. Loses slipper running from ball. Prince searches Kingdom for her. Step-sisters try on slipper first and it doesn't fit. Fits her... happily ever after.

Original version - Zezolla (Cinderella) and nanny kill stepmother. Nanny becomes evil stepmother, complete with 6 stepdaughters. Zezolla captures fairy and gets prom clothes. Goes to many balls. Prince falls for her and has help hunt for her. She drops a piaella (1ft tall stiltlike cork-soled galoshes worn over slippers) and scared servant gives to Prince. Prince goes hunting and ends up at Zezolla's house. Stepmother has first daughter cut off big toe to fit into piaella, but blood tips off Prince. Second daughter cuts off part of her heels, but that pesky blood tips off the sharp-witted Prince one more time. Comes back and finds Zezolla. For good measure, the two foot carving step-sisters are blinded for being so jealous of their kin folk. Almost everyone lives happily ever after.

I think Disney took a few liberties in post producton... don't you?

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