The Iran Election Fraud... or maybe not...

Dear Congressman,

It appears over the weekend that the fix was in on the Iranian elections, with everyone's favorite nonsense-talking President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad defeating his opponent Mir Hossein Mousavi in a supposed landslide vote. Mousavi supporters are up in arms over the alleged theft of the election, with continued rallies in the streets and protests from rooftops. Of course, it doesn't help the Irani government's case that it was a fair vote when they start to block cell phone signals and internet connections as part of the plan to stop the demonstrations, but then Iran has never been a county to shy away from controversy.

However, on the other side of the coin, it appears that a Washington D.C. based non-profit group called "Terror Free Tomorrow: The Center for Public Opinion" did a scientific analysis of the Iranian public and published a 70 page report that demonstrated that Ahmadinejad was in fact leading 2-1 in their survey.

I have memories of the original Iranian revolution of 1979, as I was living in Paris at the time and the events dominated headlines and sometimes events there. I clearly remember walking down the Champs-Elysees seeing the building for the Bank of Iran post a huge picture of the Ayatollah Ruhollah Khomeini in their front window, and the next week walking by and seeing a bullet hole in the glass right through his forehead.

So, would I like to see Ahmadinejad run out of office... you bet. But did he lose the election? Let's collect all the facts before we decide that one...

Happy Fathers Day, Issur Danielovitch.....

Dear Congressman,

This correction appeared in the LA Times this morning. Thanks to Slate.com for pointing it out....

"An article in Wednesday's Calendar about Michael Douglas receiving the American Film Institute Life Achievement Award said he missed the AFI tribute when his father, Kirk Douglas, received the same award in 1991, and quoted the actor-producer as saying he didn't recall where he was at the time. In fact, the younger Douglas not only attended the ceremony but also served as its host. Douglas said through a spokesman Wednesday that he had forgotten about the event of 18 years ago."

Nice one Michael....

Spend, spend, spent....

Dear Congressman,

According to Bill Gross, the main guru over at Bond wizard company PIMCO, the American consumer has changed from an attitude of "shop til you drop" to "save to the grave". Now, as yourself, growing up in the last few decades with rampant consumerism and the need to "keep up with the Jones", I somehow feel that this is overstating it just a little bit. Granted, with 10% unemployment and spending scale backs of mammoth proportions, it does look gloomy if you own a whole bunch of specialty retailer stocks in your portfolio right now. But I would have faith in the consumers ability to belligerently spend money like it was radioactive and dangerous to hold on to.

Personally, I think we have gone from "shop til you drop" to "shop until you have to stop", mainly because of reduced credit and overdrawn bank accounts, but until that point is reached the average American consumer can still be counted on to come through to purchase those Asian manufactured goods at a pace steady enough to keep China out of trouble.

And "save to the grave", ...nah... it's more like "save until we come out of the cave". Talking heads in this country keep going on about how the til has tilted and people are now finally starting to save part of what they earn. But they don't give that all American need to have a bunch of stuff enough credit. Also, keep in mine that with the Pension Protection Act of 2006 companies have slowly begun withholding 3% of all new employee's pay automatically to a retirement account. I somehow thing this is contributing to America's sudden increasing love of saving.

So no sweat America, just run to the mall and get that new cell phone, pair of jeans, and latest "as seen on TV gadget". After all, the world does not have enough shamwows now, does it?

And you thought you had problems...

Dear Congressman,

Since you are busy fighting both lobbyists and liberals alike, I figured I would summarize the biggest political scandal of the year-to-date: the United Kingdom House of Commons MP expense allowances. It appears that the members of Parliament have been a loose with the rules of what they have been claiming for expenses over the last few years. Here's a few highlights:

Five Sinn Fein Members of Parliament for Northern Ireland : claimed over $750,000 over the last five years in expenses, even though they refused to come to London to attend Parliament during the entire period. My kind of gig!

Member of Parliament for Ryedale: This MP put in a claim for 89 cents for a box of matches. Needless to say it probably costs over $20 in administrative costs to process the claim.

Member of Parliament for West Derbyshire: Seems to have an insect problem because this MP put in a $250 claim for removal of a wasp hive from his home. I always found a can of bug spray from the DIY shop did just fine for this type of problem.

Member of Parliament for Norfolk South West: This MP loves trees, as the British public bought them some cherry laurels and red cedar trees. I wonder if this member had important political discussions affecting the state of the English economy on their cellular phone while sitting under these trees. Probably not....

Member of Parliament for Surrey Heath: I love the Tate Modern too, but I would not think to charge the general public $30 for the purchase of mugs there. In fact, if the Tate Modern is run by the Government, this is maybe this MP's method for stimulating the British economy by transferring money from one branch to another.

Member of Parliament for Rushcliffe: This MP turned in a claim for the purchase of a copy of "Windows XP for Dummies". Maybe they should have bought "How to Avoid Headlines in the National Press for Dummies" instead?

Member of Parliament for Wells: Turned in claims for bags of horse manure. Kind of appropriate, don't you think....

And my favorite....
Member of Parliamentfor Sleaford and North Hykeham: Yes, this MP turned in claims totaling $3,200 to have their moat cleaned.

Now, I have always bit the bullet and cleaned my own moat. But maybe I am just funny that way...

Employment for all

Dear Congressman,

I noted today that even with the unemployment figures showing another 500,000+ people reaching the unemployment line last month, there is one company that is coming to the rescue of the American worker....

Yes, it is Wal-Mart.

Wal-Mart has announced that in 2009 they plan on opening or expanding 150 of their locations and hiring an additional 22,000 employees during the year.

Just a few small issues here....

1. Wal-Mart tends to mainly higher employees close to the minimum wage, which will not help someone who has to raise and feed a household.

2.Their health insurance plan is relatively expensive, so many have to choose between rent and food or insurance for their families, so they have to go uninsured. (2004 statistics quoted 2/3rd of employees were uninsured)

3. Wal-Mart has a litany of lawsuits it is defending against for sexual and wage discrimination.

So adding these jobs to replace higher income wages does not help the average worker. It is not quite a Mc-job, but it appears that for one of the largest corporations in the USA they could do a little better in the employee relations area, lest we start referring to it as Wal-work.

This is what we find....

Dear Congressman,

The other day I was sitting watching the evening news. As usual, the commercials that ran during the broadcast were all from the pharmaceutical companies pimping their latest products to an unsuspecting public. I say "unsuspecting" because one of them caught my attention with some of the "fine print" that the announcer tries to gloss over while reading the list of potential side effects that the Food and Drug Administration require them to disclose.

"There have been reports of patients experiencing intense urges to gamble, increased sexual urges, and other intense urges and the inability to control these urges while taking...."

Excuse me? This drug is being proscribed for a minor ailment referred to as Restless Leg Syndrome, that a fair share of doctors believe is being exaggerated by the drug maker as to the quantity of suffers bouncing on their beds on a nightly basis. A possible side effect is the overwhelming urge to double down on a pair of nines while I attempt to mount the casino's cocktail waitress?????

Excuse me if I say, for the sake of my marriage, that I would probably attempt another non-pharmaceutical solution if it were presented to me.

BTW- since the FDA makes the drug maker disclose other potential issues, here is a list of them for future reference:

From phase II other adverse effects categorized as frequent: Abdominal pain, constipation, gastroesophageal reflux disease, stomach discomfort, toothache, asthenia, chest pain, influenza-like illness, rigors, bronchitis, gastroenteritis, gastroenteritis viral, lower respiratory tract infection, rhinitis, tooth abscess, urinary tract infection, muscle spasms, musculoskeletal stiffness, myalgia, neck pain, osteoarthritis, tendinitis, hypoesthesia, migraine, anxiety, depression, irritability, sleep disorder, and erectile dysfunction, asthma, pharyngolaryngeal pain, night sweats, rash, hot flush, hypertension, and hypotension.

I did not include the infrequent list as it contained about 3 times as many ailments as the frequent list.

As a side note, I do not mean to understate the trauma of this condition to anyone who suffers from it. I just personally have never met any of you.....

The Decline of Western Civilization

Dear Congressman,

I believe today, finally, that the reality TV plague has begun it's long and tedious downward slide to the annals of history, with a special slot right next to Pet Rocks, Members Only Jackets, and barbwire bicep tattoos. Here's why courtesy of the Associated Press:

LOS ANGELES - The Southern California woman who gave birth to the world's longest-surviving set of octuplets has signed a deal to star in a reality television series, her lawyer said Sunday.

Nadya Suleman, who gave birth to the six boys and two girls in January and also has six other children, agreed to be filmed for a proposed television show by Eyeworks, a Netherlands-based production company, attorney Jeff Czech said.

The company hasn't yet sold the show to any American television network, he said.

Since Katie Couric did not succeed in ending her life, it is only appropriate that someone came up with the astounding idea that giving this woman her own TV show. In fact, I think after about three episodes of following Ms. Suleman around, you will be able to get sponsors banging on the network's door trying to run ads. Some fitting ads might be:

Brinks Security Alarm Systems: Because you never know when Nadya will want to visit you!

Trojan Prophylactics: Eight might not be enough for Nadya, but none is plenty for you.

Hummer : If she's out there driving, we can make you safe....